


Funtime at the Fairgrounds

by liz_fic



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Universe, Challenge Response, Crack, F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-05
Updated: 2011-03-05
Packaged: 2017-10-16 03:17:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/167837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liz_fic/pseuds/liz_fic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Willow and Spike go to an agricultural/county fair, wackiness ensues.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Funtime at the Fairgrounds

**Author's Note:**

> Challenge Response-- So that means it's OOC and Cracky--but it was fun to write! Completed 5 Aug 2001, minor edits have been made.

"Come on, Spike! Please? For me?" Willow pouted. She was trying to get Spike to take her out to the Sunnydale Expo Center tonight for the first ever Sunnydale Harvest Festival. It was fall and for some reason all the people in the surrounding rural areas decided to show off their agricultural prowess and have a carnival this year. Willow knew it had to be some kind of demony master plan by the new mayor because the city had never had one before. This was Sunnydale, California, home to the Hellmouth, not Farmer Jacobs and his three foot squash. The entire Scooby Gang, including the LA branch, was going to recon the situation, and meet up at Spike and Willow's apartment afterwards.

"Fine, fine, luv. We'll go, do we have to bring Xapper with us? Anya I can handle, but if I have to watch Chubs eat carnival food, I might puke." Spike only agreed because he loved his little red- haired witch, even when she was pouting. She made him happy, especially when she did that thing with her tongue. She smiled and kissed him sweetly.

"Yes, we have to bring Xander, but Anya left this morning, remember? She went to the realm of D'Hoffryn to request her powers again. She and Xander haven't been together for weeks anyway, you know that Spikey." She leaned over and kissed him soundly, rubbing her silk covered breasts against his chest.

"You don't play fair, pet. You can have the shower first."

"You don't want to join me?" She whispered in his ear.

"Pet, we'd never leave the house. I'm going to the kitchen to feed, luv." She kissed him again. He groaned and rolled out of bed, giving Willow a much appreciated view of his naked backside. He knew that if he didn't get out of bed now that he wouldn't want to get out of bed for the rest of the night and Willow had her heart set on going to that bloody human gathering. He pulled on his discarded boxers and walked towards the kitchen.

Thirty minutes later they were both dressed and ready to leave their apartment. They walked down the hall to Xander's place which he had shared with Anya until recently. He opened the door with a purple bag strapped across his chest. Willow noticed the golden cream filled cakes poking out and knew what Xander was planning. Spike however, thought he looked like a wuss.

"Um, Chubs, there something you want to tell us? You look like that poofy Teletubbie. You're not wearing that and walking around with us." Spike said authoritatively.

"But it has all my junk food in it! I have to have it!" Xander looked as if Spike had asked him to join the priesthood.

"Bugger, I'll buy you whatever junk food you need. Let's go, mate." Xander reluctantly left his purple bag of goodies at home and they walked to the fair. It didn't take long for them to start seeing and hearing signs of the fair.

"Hey, I smell barbecue!" Xander said and took off towards the entrance gates.

"Does he always think with his stomach, luv?" Spike sighed.

"Yep, you should see him at an all you can eat pizza buffet. Its scary." Willow smiled. The couple walked into the fairgrounds amazed at the throng of people that turned out for an agricultural fair. There were more people out after sundown than Willow had seen since the last Christmas shopping rush.

Willow convinced Spike to see the livestock area first. The walked past rows of pigs and then further back to the cattle. The couple avoided the chickens like the plague, however, they both knew how badly they would smell. They stopped at a crowd of people that were milling back behind the arena where most of the events were going to happen later in the evening. The area was all muddy from the fairground workers hosing it down earlier in the day to keep the dust levels down. The crowd was cheering and jeering at two combatants covered in mud.

"You take that back, you pillock!" The man on top yelled in a British accent while beating the other man's head into the soft mud.

"I will not, you're nothing but common whore, prancing about with those two extremely young harlots! You're not fit to be a watcher, gallivanting with your own slayer! Its disgusting and a mockery to your duty!" The man being beaten yelled, unaware of the large crowd that had drawn near. Willow froze at the words 'watcher' and 'slayer'. She knew exactly who was fighting and wondered how she could break the crowd up and make them forget the British men's words.

"You're just mad you didn't get there first, old man! Never mind the fact that your slayer doesn't even speak to you unless she needs your books once a month, you pompous prick! You wonder why, don't you? She knows all about the fishnet hose you wear under your clothes. She asked me if all watchers had strange fetishes after the debacle with the telepathic demons! I happen to love Faith and Cordelia and it is none of your business what I or the girls do!" Wesley finished his speech with a right cross to the older watchers jaw, effectively silencing the rest of the fight. With nothing more to jeer at, the crowd dispersed, leaving Willow slack jawed at the revelations and Spike grinning like a madman.

"Ooh, that was fun, pet, think they'll do an encore?" Spike smiled at the look on Willow's face, it was priceless seeing her surprised. Buffy ran to Giles when she finally stopped gaping at the scene and noticed he was unconscious in the mud and was pleading for him to wake up. Wesley had ran off towards the men's restrooms to clean up and find his two lovers, hoping they hadn't seen the fight with his former mentor.

"Giles," Buffy whined, "why were you and Wesley fighting? I don't care if he's with Faith and Cordelia. I don't care if you wear fishnet hose under your clothes. I love you anyway! Angel and Riley are a thing of the past!" Buffy leaned down and kissed Giles, getting all muddy in the process. Willow and Spike had definitely seen enough and thought they might lose what was left of the early dinner they had eaten at the horrible sight of Buffy kissing anyone.

"Let's go luv, before I have flashbacks of that awful spell you did after dogboy left." Spike tugged on Willow's hand and led her over towards the exit. On the way she got the second surprise of the night, Angel was learning to swing dance under a tent in between the carnival area and the riding arena. She stopped to gawk at the man, well, vampire who could dance worse than Xander, and then she noticed that he *was* dancing with Xander. She giggled at that and followed Spike through the crowd knowing that Angel would make sure nothing happened to her best friend on the way home. Judging by the way they were dancing, Willow knew that vampire might be staying in town longer than just this one night.

The walk back to their apartment seemed shorter than the walk to the fairgrounds, but Spike was practically running Willow home.

"Spike, wait, what is your hurry?" Willow asked as she caught up to him near their front door.

"The whole bleedin crew is going to be here in an hour and I don't want to miss my program." Spike opened the door and went straight towards the living room turning on the tv. The familiar X-Files theme song drifted into the kitchen where Willow was preparing some food for the gang's arrival.

"Oh no you don't mister! You'll get right in here and help me!" Willow yelled to the bleached vampire tugging his boots off in the living room.

"But I don't even eat, luv. Why do I have to cook?" He pouted. Normally this tactic would work on Willow and he'd get to watch Mulder and Scully find creepy crawly things to look at, but this time Willow wasn't budging.

"All right, pet. Give me that packet and I'll do this part." Willow beamed at him and kissed him on the cheek. The preparations didn't take long and the food was in the oven in a matter of minutes. Spike got to watch his program and the rest of the Scoobies arrived shortly thereafter.

"Did anyone find anything?" Willow asked the assembled group of demon hunters and world-savers. Everyone in the room agreed that except for the brief tussle between Giles and Wesley which was smoothed over once Buffy stepped in, there wasn't anything odd about the whole night.

"Nope," Xander said, "the only strange thing I found tonight was this jar of peanut butter." Angel leaned over and whispered into Xander's ear which caused the young man to blush.

"Ok, how bout food here, what're we having?" Xander said changing the subject quickly, "Junior, I'll bet you made Willow do all the cooking!"

Xander teased, to which the blonde indignantly replied, "Its Shake-N-Bake, and I helped!"

**Author's Note:**

> the challenge: w/s romantic--smut optional
> 
> must haves--reference to teletubbies, the phrase "Hey! I smell barbeque!", the x-files theme song, w/s smoochies (with each other), the phrase, "Its ShakeNBake, and I helped!", someone wearing fishnet stockings.
> 
> add 4 or more of the following--a jar of peanut butter, buffy professing her love to Giles, Xander joining the priesthood, Willow pregnant with Spike's baby, Angel learning how to swing dance, Cordelia robbing a bank, two characters mud wrestling, the phrase "Dammit, how come every time Kenny dies on South Park, he doesn't stay dead?" "Clones, man. Clones."


End file.
